We Go To The Mattresses
Each boy was sitting at opposite ends of the dining room
table eating waffles for breakfast before school.
I checked on them numerous times during the daily hustle
that is hurry-eat-get-dressed-and-out-the-door-ahhhh!
In between dressing, blow drying, etc. I paused to peep in and
see how the waffle eating had progressed when I overheard Eli going mafia on
Jackson.
From across the table, waffle in hand, the tiny don quietly stated,
“You, hit me.”
Jackson, waffle in mouth a table away, immediately responded,
“No, I didn’t!”
“You, hit me.”
“No. I did not.”
“You. Hit. Me. Jackson.”
He sounded like an evil baby making sure his victim was
getting the picture. As if to say: You hit me and that is how it’s going down.
Each word in a deep voice, each pronounced slowly and with
purpose.
I was standing, hidden behind Eli with my mouth agape. My
adorable baby turned mob boss was outlining the threats crystal clear – setting
up his target. Jackson just sat there shaking his head and stuffing his face
with more waffle.
It was about to go down.
I eventually came around the corner and looked at both boys.
Jackson’s face was in a state of exaggerated disbelief, humor and waffle.
“What’s going on here?’ I demanded.
And in the sweetest, most adorable, tiny baby voice Eli squeaked, “Jackson hit me, mama!”
“He did?”
“Yes.”
“Where?”
“Right dere,” he
squeaked while pointing to the top of his head.
I glanced to the other end of the table where Jackson had
remained the entire time.
The look on Jackson’s face was a mix of “this baby is
crazy” with “I better start watching my back” and a little syrup.
This gives a whole new meaning to the Terrible Twos.
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