Elvis thinks you are a stupid sheep: Hello! Yes, I am pleased to be a part of this pack that provides, but generally speaking you are kind of dumb and need so much work and direction. In the morning, it takes hours of soft, high pitch whining to finally get you out of bed. True, it is still dark and cold out but really why do you waste so much time in that bed, stupid sheep? Are you worried that you might forget to feed me? I know I am. Now that you are standing and starting to wobble toward the hallway, I shall have to prance and dart and spin you toward the kitchen. True, you might trip over me and break your neck but it must be done. This way you will know where to go. Without my circling and darting you might end up in the bathroom robotically and repetitively banging your against a random corner. I always have to provide you such positive reinforcement when I can see that you are getting closer to the end goal: the garage food source. Once there, I must...