Do I Have Pants On?

You know how some things just all fall apart at once?

The other day I was in a rush. I collected Jackson from school and upon entering the house I ran to let the dog out, left the kid to his own amusement for a moment and dashed for my own potty break.

Seconds later I hear Jackson having a lengthy conversation with someone.

Did the phone ring?

No.

Hmmmm.
I hurry out into the sun room in the middle of switching from work clothes to at-home clothes when I realize he is talking to someone at the front door.
But the front door is locked. Is someone in the house?

Eric's not due in for a while and by the way, where is the dog? Not in the backyard.

I swear I just let him out.

As I near the living room, I realize Jackson is talking to the next door neighbor.

Oh crap.

I check to make sure I have on pants.

I wonder how they are chatting it up so casually in the living room.

When I round the corner, Jackson and the neighbor are discussing how she has returned Elvis and would he open the door to let him in?

And this is what I see:

Apparently within minutes:

I let the dog out.

He escaped.

The neighbor came to the front door to return him and Jackson pulled the door knob off trying to let her in.

As I finally get to the now un-openable door, I peek through and see the neighbor holding Elvis. In fact, she has him at just an angle that really I am now making eye-contact with the dog through the empty door-knob hole.

I yell through the tiny hole to meet me round back so I can collect the dog.

There is no dignity in parenthood.